mark his words: Tourist Time in Hollywood

Cliché photographs, huge crowds, famous landmarks, inflated prices; from those who love it, to those who avoid it like the plague, to those like myself, who view it as a guilty indulgence, a chance to take the easy yet cheesy route, playing the role of super tourist divides opinion.

After swerving in and out the masses of crowds along the Walk of Fame, dodging people holding up traffic to get photographs of the Hollywood Sign and driving down Sunset Boulevard pondering if the jet black SUV with jet black tint on its windows was a celebrity in transit, it was clear we had ticked off a lot of the usual Americana to-do list.

Our first foray into the world of the tourism masses started with our trip to Universal Studios. Much like Warner Bros Studio that we would visit a couple of days later, both studios are well aware of, and continually make mention, how 'fake' their industry is. Almost as if they're pre-emptively clearing the air as to avoid having to defend themselves later. Unsurprisingly, this artificial construct seems to apply to greater Hollywood, or even Los Angeles landscape as whole.

While every person we have come across has been extremely pleasant, it feels like every guide, every presenter, every performer is partaking in a life-long audition, trying to get noticed, plucked out of oblivion and thrown into the life of a celebrity. It's hard to definitively capture how it made me feel, as in a way it's sad to know so many dreams will be crushed, yet in a way it's somewhat inspiring to see so many people out there trying to get their big break, even if they are one of tens of thousands of other extroverted, charming, funny, good looking people within a hour radius.

After we had the theme parks and movie studios ticked off, we continued our cruise through Beverly Hills and Burbank, before heading back to more central Hollywood to be part of a guest audience for the Late, Late Show with Craig Ferguson. In keeping with the theme set throughout the last couple of days, we were told on no less than half a dozen occssions that regardless of whether we got the joke or found it funny to force out a laugh. Given we had originally intended to try see Conan and Craig was only an afterthought, there was a considerable amount of 'forcing' during the shooting of the show. But at least we can tick that one off.